Stupidville UK

Oh yes, the town I live in contains the highest percentage of stupid people in the whole world. Unfortunately most of them drive.

Just the other day I pulled my car over to the right hand side of the road, ready to drive diagonally across the road to reverse my car into my drive. I saw a car approaching from the other direction, but seeing as the person had to stop at the crossing there was obviously no imminent danger of us having a head on collision. I have no idea what was going through the mind of this driver but as she passed she looked at me as if I was completely mad and muttered something under her breath. Did she think I was actually going to continue driving on the wrong side of the road for the whole length of the road? Has she never seen anyone park facing oncoming traffic before?

This isn’t the first time I have received funny looks when parking my car on my drive. I have no idea why but the whole “reversing car into drive” thing seems to completely confuse everyone in the vicinity. It’s like they’ve never seen it done before.

I seem to have the same problem when I’m parking in town. Today I was in a car park when I pulled diagonally across the “road” to reverse into a parking space, but the person in the car behind me pulled up right behind me! So naturally I shouted (as you do when you forget that your window is wound down) “Stop being so stupid! It’s obvious I’m reversing into a space! Why else would I drive diagonally across the road?” I don’t know if he heard me or not, but he backed off, and as he passed I gave him one of those “if looks could kill you would be dead right now” looks.

Sometimes people are a little overly patient though. Approaching crossroads on my way home there was a car sitting in the middle, facing me, waiting for me to pass so that he could turn. Now I make no exaggeration when I say I was still half way up the flamin’ road and a long way off from the junction – this person had all the time in the world to turn into the road, but I still had to flash him before he did.

Give me strength. It’s bad enough when pedestrians lack road sense, but other motorists?